ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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