she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize
