Are we in a gay sports bar?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
