I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
