A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I have fence marks all over my body
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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