I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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