Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I bet he comes in French.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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