was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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