i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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