Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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