pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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