their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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