imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
