I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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