garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
