so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
