what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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