Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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