Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
