oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize