It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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