Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
