You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Randomize
