What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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