i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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