You're completely useless in the revolution.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
