Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
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You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
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Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.