Kareoke will never be a sober sport
never play flip cup with pint glasses
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
