he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
They left me at home... I'm a liability
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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