Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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