he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
