How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
