At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
