I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
