I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
operation have a gay friend backfired
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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