just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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