we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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