i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
