Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
