Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.