i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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