i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
