something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
