just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize