I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize