Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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