I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
a search helicopter?!
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
