who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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