its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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