so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
