i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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